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Xtra Time Podcast
Xavier Sanchez has re-entered the audio world with a brand new podcast called the Xtra Time Podcast. Free time does not come around often so when it does people want to spend it wisely. This weekly podcast offers a range of insight into sports, music, pop culture, and more through a 1-on-1 interviews in those field.
Xtra Time Podcast
The Xtra Time Podcast- Berta Sanchez
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The Xtra Time Podcast by Xavier Sanchez welcomes Berta Sanchez.
I invite my sister, Berta, for a special interview. We discussed her life growing up as the we had similar but different experiences, becoming a mom, changing careers, and more.
I also learned about her favorite trends, summertime, music, and more.
She even asks me an a questions. Hey, that's my job!!
Family is important so this episode is important to me so I hope you all enjoy!
All that and more in this episode!
Follow @xtratimepod on Instagram and Twitter/x!
Welcome to the Extra Time Podcast. I'm your host, Xavier Sanchez. Thank you for checking out this episode. Today is a much anticipated, nearly seven years in the making episode. Hoping for everyone to enjoy this one as much as I did. This is a full 90-minute breakdown of a lot of topics, life, and just a fun chat with a sibling. Let's get into episode 11's interview. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the chat with my amazing sister and role model, Berta Sanchez. Today is a special guest, a much anticipated guest. She's a nurse, a mom, an aunt, a runner, a reader, many other things. But most importantly, I think to me, my big sister, Berta, welcome to the show today. Thanks for joining me.
SPEAKER_01Hey, Ken, thanks for having me finally.
SPEAKER_02How are you today?
SPEAKER_01I'm good. How are you?
SPEAKER_02I'm doing great. Got lots a loaded episode. Um, beginning. So for those that are listening, my sister, she is the oldest of the siblings and the oldest cousin of the group. Uh, when did you kind of, you know, you're still young, so when did you kind of realize you're the oldest of the pack?
SPEAKER_01Well, thanks for framing the question that way, because yes, I am still young. Uh as far as feeling like the oldest, I guess I've never had like that moment of realization, just because it just has always been what it's been. Or even I guess maybe more so now as an adult and seeing my kids with grandparents. The oldest person that I think I've known pretty much all of our life, like pretty intimately, is our mom. Like, we didn't really have older people. And now that I'm getting, now that my kids are around much older people, and now that after my kids are turning to teenagers, there's another cousin that just had a baby, two cousins that just had a baby. I think that's where I really started to realize the gap of how old I am.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you uh got started and left us in the dust, man. You talk about pressure. It's like your kids are gonna be 25 and the next uh little ones will come in. Um yeah, no, you see you see at school uh uh growing up the grandparent days, and it's like, nope, that doesn't exist. Old people, it's I the the oldest people you know is your your friend's grandparents, parents. Um, so for those we're gonna date her once again. My sis I was born in '97, my sister born in '89. So while we're still close in age, in a way, there's still so many different like trends and norms we've experienced. Um what's what's one of your uh favorite memories uh growing up?
SPEAKER_01So it's interesting too, because this summer when I was just recently back home, there was a power outage, which as an adult now seems kind of miserable. Like it's so hot, you're driving and there's no streetlights. But I remember so distinctly this memory from like being relatively new on our block growing up and the power went out, and it was and it feels like it happened the first summer, and then like every subsequent summer after, there'd be like three to four blackout days, and it just being like the best times, like hanging out with all the kids in the call of the sack, getting a special lunch at Looms. I don't know if you remember that, just to like get some reprieve and air conditioning.
SPEAKER_02No, but but but mom did she's like, Oh, we went to a looms. I was like, I don't recall, but yeah, it seems like we had the the Ted Cruz power grid set up in this state because like until those years, we haven't really dealt with um those uh power outages, and that's what I was thinking. I was like, not so much that you know you want to feel cool and you have priorities, not just like hanging around, but uh those power outages were much better when all my siblings and neighbors were around. This one this time around, it was too almost two times as long, and no one was around here. I'm like, uh, get me get this power back on. I I can't do this anymore.
SPEAKER_01Well, especially when you're recovering from surgery and you're kind of stuck, like for you, especially with the hospital bed, yeah, and was locked being locked in the world's most uncomfortable spot.
SPEAKER_02It was not sleeping position, it was watching TV position. Uh what was the best pop culture moment or trend of the 90s and 2000s that you liked, whether it's uh like music, um, like a toy or like a style?
SPEAKER_01Oh man, so many. Okay, so I wasn't big into boy bands, but I was in a group of four, like there were four of us that grew up together, four girls. Um, and we did do like a boy band circuit for a couple of years. We were we saw everybody, like obviously, I think we saw NSync and Backstreet Boys, 98 Degrees. Um there was there was like another one from making the band, but I can't think of the name. Can you think of it? Uh that's gonna drive me crazy. It'll pop, it'll pop up. Uh so obviously the the boy band era and then like spice girls. I remember being at Amy's house and we would watch Spice World and would like try to do dances to the songs, uh, butterfly clips.
SPEAKER_02And which which of the Spice Girls were you?
SPEAKER_01Which one do you think?
SPEAKER_02I only know Posh.
SPEAKER_01Um, I would say Sporty was the most adjacent to my personality because probably more tomboy than my other friends.
SPEAKER_02Olivia, however, uh and for those listening, my I have a niece and nephew named Olivia and Miles, uh 13 and 12. Do I have that correct?
SPEAKER_01Yep. Um, which I'll have to send you a picture of this later, but she recently she's into like she's one of those girls that like she doesn't want to do the exercise stuff, but she loves a good like exercise outfit.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, she's into like the aesthetics of everything right now, idea, but you know, sometimes there's a little bit of work that goes into the the fun of it all.
SPEAKER_01We've been we've been forcing we've been forcing these walks in the afternoon as like a money-free family together time. She does not love it, but it'll be good for her in the long run. But she just got this full, it's a top and a bottom, both leopard print. And when she wears her hair down, she is definitely serving Joel. So it was like, what does she think she is? Uh cheetah girl, but she looks exactly like Sporty Spice with the fit on.
SPEAKER_02That is funny. What about what what's what's one that that you just disliked? One of those trends that came about even a little bit l a little bit later.
SPEAKER_01I feel like just in general, like I I don't like lots of stuff. So just like then and now, like um toys that are fads, I never I guess caught on to like I so Roth, um he who's our younger, uh, my younger brother, your older brother, and we're only 13 months apart. He was obsessed with like I think he did a crazy bone collection, which if you don't know what those are, do you do you know? Yes, you do know. Um, people would probably have to look them up because I've mentioned these to other people and they're like, I don't know what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_02I feel like that that one is still kind of niche. Yeah, when I when I see them, people talk about them. There's still sometimes you you bring something up and they're like, I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm like, this was like a big thing. I guess maybe it was to one person.
SPEAKER_01That's what I'm like, I don't understand. Well, it I mean, it had to have been a pretty big thing, like at least locally, because I remember fifth grade, like I'm pretty sure it's fifth grade or maybe middle school, crazy bones, warheads, and like there was like this handful of things that got banned from bringing to school, so you couldn't bring crazy bones because I think there's probably like an issue with stealing or like them going missing and people getting mad or whatever, but yeah, so like any type of those things, like crazy bones. I never really got into. We had a ton of beanie babies, but like I'm like, I don't really understand the whole I mean, kudos to mom and her friends and stuff. We're getting up and like going to McDonald's and collecting all of them for us.
SPEAKER_02We have yet to be rich from them, but except the I just learned that the Beanie Babies persons from Illinois from LaGrine. Seriously, yeah. What do you know how old they are? Probably like 50s. Um not that old. I was like the people didn't get rich, but I think he must have been doing well because I think he lives in a nice neighborhood.
SPEAKER_01The the like founders of beanie babies did not get rich?
SPEAKER_02Some someone, whether it's the founder, the creator, the owner, uh is in La Grange.
SPEAKER_01But they did not get rich?
SPEAKER_02No, they they're I said they're probably doing well since they're a nice, nice town.
SPEAKER_01Well, and especially like I feel like Thai, what is it, the Thai company that has TY. I feel like that's like a like notable branding.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And they still have like they're not beanie babies per se, but there's like t y toys.
SPEAKER_02Here too.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02I think I would say one of the I Harry Potter would have been a cool uh like any big thing, uh, would have been cool, like like you see like the Beatles for a time that had their rise for that kind of time of you growing up. I think Harry Potter was that with uh you got from everything movies, toys, um the book itself. I caught the tail end. I saw one of the movies, but it all happened a lot before me.
SPEAKER_01Did you did you read, did you read those books?
SPEAKER_02No, not yet. Not yet. They're we did buy them. We found a great deal at a uh at a flea market of sorts for $30 for the complete set, all hardcover. Oh, that's really good. I think they still sell for like $20 a hardcover for the biggest ones and probably a little bit less for the smaller ones. So for $30, we couldn't pass that up.
SPEAKER_01No, that's a really that's a really good deal. I think I still have I borrowed an audiobook set of one of them from Vince, our next door neighbor growing up, and I I think I still have, and I really need to make sure to return that at some point. But that was cool to see like kids get hyped about that too.
SPEAKER_02Not reading.
SPEAKER_01I just saw Joel and I just watched The Devilers Prada. Um, we wanted to watch the second one, and Miles, my 13-year-old, he hadn't seen the first one. He's like, I haven't seen the first one yet. So we watched that first, and it was it's funny, like so. In the movie, um, like the person who's supposed to be um oh, I'm drawing a blank on who's the who's editor of Oak?
SPEAKER_02Um, that skinny lady, Anne Wintour.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, Anne Wintour. Uh, the character that is supposed to marry her, played by Meryl Streep. She like puts her assistant on like uh it's almost like a test because she messed something up to get the unreleased copy of the new Harry Potter book. And I was like, oh man, what a callback.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I did uh I watched that for the first time this year as well when I saw that that new movie came out. I haven't seen the second one yet, but no, I did like the first one.
SPEAKER_01You should watch the second one. I thought they did it pretty I thought they did it justice. Also, I think everybody from that movie has aged incredibly well.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it is funny to see. Ann Hathaway kind of looks similar, but the other girl looks so much different. A little bit like similar but different. Like she looks like a like a teenage for like a younger person in the first one. Now she looks more like an adult.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Um you you've you've tried a bunch of things. You played sports, we always were involved in various activities. Uh what was one what was the one that you were hate to say goodbye to?
SPEAKER_01Probably probably cross country. And I I like I don't, you know, I think things pan out the way they're supposed to, like with the choices you make. But if there was one thing I could go back when I went to Loris, I think I would have tried to do cross-country there. Like, I'm not I'm not a competitive person, but I think like that's what I liked about cross country is it's like if you're not top seven, like it's more of a competition of yourself, like with yourself. And then also it's just it's weird to do this independent sport and still feel this in like incredible sense of like um community and just belonging. I I don't know, I loved I love cross country, I love doing um running camp in the summer at Stag and like getting to go downtown and running the lake shore. Like those are some of my favorite summer memories.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and Lars that had and stag had those strong communities with that. Yeah, they even took on, like you didn't have to be the super fast runner as long as you showed up and competed, they would have kept people on. Uh yeah, I remember all those uh pasta parties here.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, mom moms were some great parties there.
SPEAKER_02And that's what's crazy is uh when I speak and work with the the schools and stuff, there's less and less of those things each and every year. There's less people to uh like at the park district, there's less Mr. Shendles to coach soccer because they feel like they should be compensated. Yeah, no no one's uh no one's coaching, but then the the if they want someone to coach these teams, the they have to jack up the price. Now the people are complaining, why does it cost more for the soccer? Well, no one wanted the volunteer to be the coach.
SPEAKER_01Wait, are they compensating like little league sports coaches?
SPEAKER_02At at the park district, they had they've always had like where some people volunteer, and then there were sometimes at some of the in like like the camps and stuff inside the school, they had um where they would pay like a little little bit for your time, but for like a full season of like the soccer program. They I don't know if they did, but they were they had talks where they were like, Well, if no one's gonna volunteer, then the price has to go up because we have to give someone money to coach the kids or there's just gonna be no soccer. Yeah, that's like we talk about how uh a lot of the school program, like the sports teams, they don't do as many pasta parties or pizza nights before a cross-country meet or after a basketball game or something, because no one uh wants to do those.
SPEAKER_01I think it is hard though, because I I I like it's under I think it's just like almost, I mean, all of my kids, their like friends' parents, I feel like everybody's for the most part, like a two working parents, and then also just the cost of things. I think that's just kind of the way of the world, but that is really sad because those are some really good memories. I felt really bad though, because I don't know if it was for a pasta party for cross country or if it was the spaghetti dinner for like the PTA or Boy Scouts, but mom made all of the pasta at home and she had like recently had the house painted. And I don't know if you I don't know if you remember this, but like the paint bled from the moisture from all of the pasta she cooked.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that was a lot of plastic bags of pasta, truly. What were um some of those jobs that interested you as you went through uh picking schools and when you're in school, what were some of those? You finished with an English major, but what were some of those other ideas that you were thinking about?
SPEAKER_01Um, so I remember writing that I had a teacher in high school, my junior year, Miss Shabna, um, who I had her for I think it was American Lit. And I just remember like getting so much out of I I actually at Stag had like really cool English lit classes. Like I did the Renaissance thing my freshman year, which was a combined English history thing, so just a different approach to that. Um, but I remember emailing Miss Chabna when I got to college, just like thanking her because she made me so passionate about books, and I do have an English degree, which people love to make fun of me about because they don't think I use it, but I like maybe not in like super, you know, tangent ways. I do use it, like I think it comes across when I'm talking to patients and things, but I think before nursing and when I was looking at college, I really thought about I always imagined myself living in Chicago, like as an adult, and I I would have loved to work in publishing or editing. Um, and then I toyed with the idea of law school, which but you're gonna be halfway. Yeah, exactly. I feel like I had I feel like I had the aesthetic at the time. I had like that long hair like her eating an onion bagel in a lumpy sweater, and getting silently judged out loud. Yeah, mostly by my brothers now, by my children.
SPEAKER_02Yes. And then you were saying um what some of the uh your other ideas?
SPEAKER_01Um, I think by the time I got to college, I and you know, like approaching my senior year of college, I really thought um I was gonna go like a law route. And um I had sat in on some of my friends' law school classes up in the cities, and I just the more the more and more I thought about it, I don't I don't think I was built for that type of life. I don't even like arguing. I will I will gladly lose an argument just to just so that the argument could stop. I don't I don't like it. I don't like confrontation.
SPEAKER_02Let's call it a day. Let's go get the train.
SPEAKER_01I'm like life is so short. What are we really mad about here? I I'll I'll pay for lunch. Let's just let's just call this a let's just call this a win for you.
SPEAKER_02That's off several criminals. Whatever.
SPEAKER_01Whatever. The there's jobs for everybody, and that's why that's why there's you know different avenues to take. That just wasn't mine.
SPEAKER_02So now now we're it's 2011. The Dallas Mavericks just won the NBA championships. My sister comes home. We're we're still not out of junior high. And my sister comes home for the summer, and by the end of the summer, we were left again. She goes, gets a job. Like the last week of the summer, actually, the first week of school, because they they call, they say, Oh, we got this job, you got to be here by Friday. We skip school, me, my dad, and my brother. We drop her off in this rinky deep little building, and she starts her new career, and we skip school that day. We actually got home on the Friday, I think it was, and or Monday, whatever it was, and we're at the gas station in our town, and we see one of the people uh that works in our school at the time pumping their gas.
SPEAKER_01But uh what uh that was a that was a good walk down from Britain. I'm I'm a little lost.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, some people, you know, every family has that person that like forget some things. Um what uh what I'm sure there was other jobs that could have popped up. What what was it like? Yeah, I gotta take this. Oh, and also side note, she's uh she's been in Minnesota since that day. It's now gonna be 15 years, which is exciting, but lots has changed, but this is the start. Um you know, a lot of people continue their job search. Sometimes they don't take maybe the first or two nibbles, but you're like, let's let's jump to something new.
SPEAKER_01Uh so the last month, and I don't know if my roommates have that, but my senior year of college, I lived with three friends, and I don't know if they have theirs, but we had made a bucket list of like things to do within the next whatever amount of time. And one of the things that I really wanted to do was do a year of service, like somehow, like Peace Corps, some type of volunteer work. Um, go ahead.
SPEAKER_02And um, for those that don't know, 2012 they thought the world was going to end, so that's probably why they had that bucket list.
SPEAKER_01That's 2012 another year they thought was gonna end.
SPEAKER_02I want to say 2012 was one of those calendars that were like, well, it ends here. They probably just ran out of ink, so that's why it ended there.
SPEAKER_01Back to your other question about the like fads. I was in fifth grade the year uh like in 2000, and the Y2K stuff was like we I remember having a Y2K party at school.
SPEAKER_02Did you unplug all your devices?
SPEAKER_01Honestly, I don't know. I mean, aside from the television and like kitchen supplies, I didn't have like I don't think we had other stuff. Like the TV that we had in our room at the time was one that you pressed yes, like with your finger at the television.
SPEAKER_02Yes, we still have those, so we haven't leveled up too far from that. Whatever change.
SPEAKER_01I I gave mom a smart TV for like her birthday or mother's day or something.
SPEAKER_02So this um bucket list had this con some of these concepts on there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it was one that was that was like in the top three things was to do a year of some type of volunteer work. Some other things get a tattoo was on there, milk a cow for some reason. I don't, I think because I was in Iowa. I don't know.
SPEAKER_02All three of these accomplished, or two of the three?
SPEAKER_01I have not milked a real cow.
SPEAKER_02Okay, so that makes just two of the three because that the tattoo does exist.
SPEAKER_01Yes, as we're aware, which mom brought out shortly after.
SPEAKER_02Two of the four siblings, as our younger brother Gabe, also has tattoos.
SPEAKER_01So well, maybe Roth does. You don't know that.
SPEAKER_02You'll have to ask him for research purposes.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, only yeah. Do you not have one? Would you ever get one? No, I'm not because you're afraid of needles.
SPEAKER_02I'm not spending money on something I am not interested in.
SPEAKER_01That's fair, but you're spending on something money on something that like you'll have forever. That's kind of a nice idea.
SPEAKER_02You do take it to the grave.
SPEAKER_01That's true.
SPEAKER_02Most are tacky and ugly.
SPEAKER_01Uh so whoa, whoa, whoa, that's gonna be a controversial you might be losing listeners from that comment.
SPEAKER_02You know, um people all ex as experiences um risk and life changes, and you you you're in a new town, and uh for people go even going back to their homes, like meeting up with friends, making new friends, that's a challenge. But you go to a whole new uh city. How was like finding friends? What was that like?
SPEAKER_01Really hard, honestly. So um, so I ended up doing a year, like the reason that I came to Minnesota was to do a year with AmeriCorps, and I got a really cool opportunity to work in a Head Start preschool here, and the focus was on social and emotional well-being of kids zero to five, and then also working with families that with kids in that age, which I'm like was a bit of foreshadowing because it was it's been super beneficial. Like the things I learned has been beneficial as a mom and as a nurse. But um, so I was working in a preschool during the day, Monday through Friday, and then I um they give you like a stipend, but I was gonna have to work too. So I waitress and I did get lucky because the the woman that hired me and the woman that was the manager there ended up being like one of my lifelong friends. Um, but outside of that, like for probably the like the large part of that first year, I really didn't meet many people. And I don't think it was until like so I moved there in August, and I don't think it was until like the winter, like after the new year, that like some of the some of the coworkers from the Head Start preschool like invited me out a couple of times. But I I also think I was like I was a little bit apprehensive about creating like really strong friendships because again, like I really only planned on being here for a year.
SPEAKER_02Did um yeah, I feel like most people um start getting friends through like their jobs, and but then like some people are hesitant to get job friends as well. They're like, I like to keep some things separate. I can only imagine what that job setting would have been like post-COVID. That would have been so stressful, even more.
SPEAKER_01I do wonder, I do wonder about that. Like, I spent a lot of time thinking like, how do people form friendships like as adults? I mean, I've been really lucky to have incredible high school and college friends, and like, and obviously, like my brothers are my you guys are like my best friends, so I don't feel the need, but like people who haven't had that, like I'm I'm very curious and very impressed by people who are like out there making friends in their 20s, 30s and up. Yeah, and post-COVID when you're like in this weird, like people are apprehensive of other people.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's then just uh on top of that was the the post-COVID stuff with um that job you had. I feel like that's gotta be times 10 with that thing. Um, so when you're working soon after you you meet someone and you have your fur you find out you're you're gonna have your first kid, and you're not necessarily young, but you're not super old too, and it's the first one. Uh what what was like the shock moment during that process? How was that for you in before telling anyone?
SPEAKER_01Did I ever tell you when I found out I was pregnant?
SPEAKER_02I I can't remember. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01Because I we I had just I had just brought Joel home to visit you guys, and like even at that time, I was just like, I don't that I don't know how invested I was, but so you guys had just I think you I think you guys had just met him, and I just felt weird during that trip, and then I came back and I had to come back because I had to work, so I missed your graduation. But I was walking in Target like the day I got back or something, and I passed by the pregnancy test, and I walked past them, and then I don't know, something in my brain like was like, uh maybe go back and get one of those, and I like backjacked and grabbed one. So I took like two or three pregnancy tests while I was watching your graduation on video.
SPEAKER_02So I found out I thought you were gonna so so you you found out during and you let us know during the graduation party. Wait a steal the thunder. I I I was also gonna laugh that you took them while you're at the target. I was like, some people have uh find out they have to go poo while they go to Target, some people find out they're pregnant. Some people, I guess, do it all at Target.
SPEAKER_01Okay, to clarify, I did I took them at home and then they were like waiting, like the I set the timer or whatever. But also back to the like bowel movements at Target, there is a whole phenomena, and I think that there are some studies out of somewhere in Asia that like it's it's actually like the bookstore phenomena, but there is something, and I have heard that there's connections between the fluorescent lighting in in those stores that makes people like somehow stimulates the bowels of Target, yeah. No, because I was just there and my dad had a run and use the bathroom while we were there, so it's putting putting him on blast on the pot.
SPEAKER_02We've all you know, I'm guessing we've all been there. I'm sure people listening will will test.
SPEAKER_01Comment below.
SPEAKER_02Uh so yeah, I do not remember that story whatsoever. I'm just locked in on the finding out. Uh well, my first introduction to Joel was uh he said he couldn't eat pork. So that was I was like, okay, now you're lying to me. And eventually you go through all this, you have a kid, and uh diapers being thrown at me here having thrown on myself and these dirty diapers in my peaceful sleep.
SPEAKER_01Well, we've got you on record. The people want to know. Have you uh taken a liking to Joel yet?
SPEAKER_02Uh yes.
SPEAKER_01Have you?
SPEAKER_02I I like most and all people.
SPEAKER_01It's hard to tell. I would say he and Gabe, he and Gabe are so tell me that sometimes mistake them as the couple. And and Roth, I remember the first time I brought him home before I had a kid, Raf had made a comment. Like he came up to me and was like, You better not let this one go because he's the best thing about you. And I was like, Wow, he must have made a real impression. But Xavier, I feel like it's been like it took like a decade for you to warm up at all.
SPEAKER_02We were um because I maybe maybe he he kept you there. I was like, ah, maybe she's coming home.
SPEAKER_01She locked, you're locked in there. Um, yeah, but think about how many more games you'll get to go to easily. Like you just went to a timber wolves game this year.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, we well that's against the bulls.
SPEAKER_01That was and what did you and what did you wear?
SPEAKER_02That wasn't the first one.
SPEAKER_01But what you Timberwolves versus the bulls, and what did you wear?
SPEAKER_02My Timberwolves uh, which I don't know if it fits. I think it it shrunk. Some of these clothes, that's another conversation for another day. These clothing brands. I have to have a word with some of them. They're it is funny, they're sizing. Why are these why is the sweatshirt body the right, but that or why are the arms right, but the body so thin, like a pencil? Making sweatshirts, sweatshirts are lounging clothes, you gotta make those bigger.
SPEAKER_01It is funny because you're so particular about clothing that like I'll be at a stern and I'll like feel the fabric and think to myself, oh, Xavier would hate this, or oh, this is I should get this for Xaver because he would love the material. But I do agree about the sizing, like and the proportions. You should try being a woman. Why is everything like a near midrift, even when it's not supposed to be?
SPEAKER_02Well, God made me mad, so I don't have to think about that.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_02Uh so you get the first grandchild of the family. There's there, you know, you feel pressures. Um, no one, everyone's still pretty much younger. Yeah. And uh well, what was uh what kind of nerves did you feel like uh as more and more of the family members now are having children? Uh what were some of those nerves for you like that uh you think could uh help them get over? And because you know, now you're you're one person you take care of, now you have to take care of a second person, but what made it less scary for you?
SPEAKER_01Um well back to like the whole getting pregnant thing. Obviously, we grew up in a like pretty, you know, like we grew up Catholic and I wasn't married and stuff, and that was I was really scared to tell the family. Also, I was real I I was young. I kept thinking to myself, like during delivery, like I kept really thinking about kids that were are in high school and stuff because at the time I was 20, I was 23, 23. Um, I just felt so young and I kept thinking, I don't know how younger, you know, younger girls do this, how younger, you know, younger girls and boys become moms and dads. And I just kept telling myself at the time Fergie from the Jersey Shore, which I think might might have been like before your time, she had just had a baby, and no shame to her because she's uh she, I mean, she's doing great, but I just kept thinking, okay, if she can do it, I can do it. Like, I don't know, and that did give me a lot of just like calm. But also, dad called me when I was made, like in the midst of mom asked me to like go on this website and pick things for a baby shower. And I I think like I had a I think I was scared the whole time, but like going through this like store full of items, thinking, oh my god, like I didn't even think that this would be something I needed. And I just like had a breakdown, like, I don't even know what I don't know. Like I was just in tears, and dad just happened to call me at that time, and I tell this story all the time, and I get emotional every time I think about it because it's like such relief. But he was like, he's like, Mija, like a baby can literally survive with just their mom. Like they literally nothing else, like your body can keep them warm and fed, and they will be fine. And I think like when things get like really overcomplicated, that's something that I think about to just like round me. Um that being said, I'm like nervous every day of my life. I'm like my kids, I think, are aware too that I'm like because I I I just want them like I think we had a really good childhood. Like, I have so many good memories, and I like like I know people are always nostalgic about the past, but I really like I felt like there was like magic, like hanging out in the cul-de-sac and like all of these different things. Mom, mom and dad really we did a lot of fun stuff, and I just want my kids to be like to look back at their childhood, and you know, you know, sometimes we'll get off the phone with one of our parents, or you and I will have a memory and like play phone tag with all the siblings. I always wonder like what are my kids experiencing that they're gonna remember?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's what we were talking about. Um we've we got to do all these cool things. Part of me is like, oh, it's been kind of fun to have the kids be here and partaking in like uh baseball or something, the scouts or something. Like, it's not that they're not doing really cool things, it's just like it's been kind of cool to have them do the same things, but yeah, but they're still doing a lot of cool things.
SPEAKER_01I look at I look at friends of mine from high school that are growing up and their kids are going to the same schools that we went to, and it part of me does get a little sad. I'm like, oh, that would have been that would have been a cool experience to share with them. I mean, Joel has that with them, obviously, but we're really lucky because because I always did worry about my side of the family missing out, but then especially you know, Facebook and you know, Facebook memories, every it seems like every week there's a memory from either you guys being here or us in Chicago.
SPEAKER_02There's one uh the other day I saw for haircuts, all sorts of yeah. Shout out to Rico for a haircut, yeah, and then the the mom taking care of the child. Yeah, my dad's one of what is it, nine, and that was pretty much a mother who took most of the substance the dad passed away so soon.
SPEAKER_01Exactly.
SPEAKER_02Now, um a little after you end up getting pregnant again with a second child. How early did you did they say that they started to find out that stuff wasn't gonna be like not normal child, but that there would be some complications and kind of a little more serious?
SPEAKER_01Not until almost right before I had her. Like so Livy was supposed to be due in August, she's my younger, and we had a vacation scheduled. What was it, June? Um it must have been, I think June. June, yeah. Yeah, no, no, no, like the first I think it was Memorial Day weekend. Oh, yeah, yeah. Because she's born June 11th, so I think it was like, yeah. So late May, I just happened to go to a checkup, and I had a different person like filling in for the person I had been going to. And I was like, I mean, like if people didn't know me, they didn't always like couldn't even tell I was pregnant. Like, I was just really tiny with Olivia. And this one dot this one, I don't know if it was a nurse practitioner or a doctor, like late May was like, I just I'm I just want to do a little bit of further testing. Like, I'm just a little bit concerned about like your size. And then they had called in a specialist from I'm in Rochester, so I was going to Olmsted Clinic and they sent in a doctor from Mayo Clinic, and they realized like with some like more detailed ultrasound, like one the bab the like baby was very small, and also there was very little fluid, so it happened really fast. Like I was going for these checkups, and then the day after we came back from vacation with you guys in Wisconsin, I was just supposed to do another ultrasound, and straight from there, so it was like a matter of two weeks, maybe, because straight after that ultrasound, they said, Yeah, you need to go over to Mayo right now, like you're probably gonna have this baby in the next day or two.
SPEAKER_02Uh how how uh how scary was those moments? And did they uh was there any relief during that period, or did it take some time to feel like okay, things are okay gonna be okay?
SPEAKER_01Um so I I I remember so you guys at that time were in like northern Wisconsin, which is not that far from where we live, you know, a couple much closer than Chicago. And I called mom, like you know, I called Joe first to just let him know that he was gonna have to meet me. And then I called mom and told like filled her in and told her I was going, you know, immediately to go to the hospital. Um and you and I are I would say of the like I I feel like you and I have a really strong faith. And I just thought to myself, because then you and I again like I'm ruining your graduation, I'm ruining one of your first trips. Um, but I really felt ruined, no ruin. I cut your guys' vacation short by days, but I remember like really feeling like lucky because mom was mom was there, and obviously you guys, but I really was like it was such a relief to have mom close by and she would I ended up, I think I ended up delivering like that day, and you and mom was able to be there, and I kept thinking like if if she had been at home, she wouldn't have made it here on time. So I just thought, like, what are the odds of her just having you know, like she you guys have never really gone on a vacation, and just when I need you guys the most, you're half the distance away that you normally would be.
SPEAKER_02Well, our vacations are to our favorite places, which is Rochester. Um, and then we had a couple of it's in the family. That was so exciting.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you okay, to fill people in. It is so funny because you have two things that you do with your words that are hilarious to me. You'll tell stories about yourself, but you always say we, and I'm so confused. I'm like, who was with you? And you're like, oh no, no, no, just me. And then for so long, you called my kid it, like both of them.
SPEAKER_02I've never been around babies, they were new, they were foreign creatures.
SPEAKER_01It shows, it's so funny.
SPEAKER_02It was all new, you know.
SPEAKER_01But you're such you're such a good uncle, and I do think I will say, I watch you, especially with Olivia, who pushes your boundaries. I do think I do think they've made you like loosen up a little bit.
SPEAKER_02I'm always loose.
SPEAKER_01Sure, if you say so.
SPEAKER_02Most fun.
SPEAKER_01The most fun out of who?
SPEAKER_02Everyone.
SPEAKER_01That is actually really true. You are, you are like usually, if it's something that you want to do, you're willing to do it.
SPEAKER_02So that's I do a lot of stuff I don't want to do. And it just you don't know because I'm having so much fun doing it.
SPEAKER_01I'm gonna, you know why it's funny because yesterday when I talked about going on this show, Joel was like, I think you should have all your siblings on there because that'd be a great conversation. And in this moment, I really wish our other siblings were here with that comment.
SPEAKER_02And I I show how much fun I have. I even ate a meal the other day when we went. Uh, you did talk about your faith. Uh how have I talk about it being one of the um people that like keep it and hold on to it. What's your faith like today? And like while things differ and you can't always do what you would like, how do you stay close to God?
SPEAKER_01I mean, I I I would say mostly through gratitude. Like I, you know, you make your choices and you you live in them, but some of my choices haven't been the best, and still I have this life that I'm very grateful for, and like I could not imagine, or even you know, back to the conversation about Olivia. Like, so Olivia was born with Turner syndrome, which a lot of those, like a lot of babies who have turners, like fetus that have have turners, don't make it to fruition. Like it's one of the highest miscarriage rates. Um, and I just look at her and she's thriving, and I know that's not always the case, but I just am like I have so much to be grateful for. Um, and I I also think like I'm I I struggle with like the element of faith that's like the um you know, like like spreading the word of God, like and like encouraging others to follow. Like sometimes I struggle with that because it's like I I I don't know that that part of that element is kind of hard for me, but I will say we're you don't like to you don't like to argue.
SPEAKER_02So while that's not a what a way of that's not arguing, that's another uncomfortable setting where you have to like have an idea and like not back down with something.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I also think like I was just talking camp cat about this. Like, I think like there's people that don't believe the same believe in like Jesus the way that I do, but are living Christ-like lives. And I kind of think that that's that's kind of the point. You know, there there's there's like value in that. Um, but I I what I will say is I working at the hospital, people who have who have a strong faith, I do think that there's like you know, when you talk about like in medicine, like these very um like tangent things like medication and tests and stuff, I do think that there's there's this this value in having faith that helps like give people a type of strength that like they don't necessarily get for medicine or something else, but yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, something to believe in. It is kind of crazy. Um when I saw Olivia Rodrigo I last year at La Palooza, and like the like when you're put in the a spot and you're putting a place and uh all these elements just kind of come together. I was waiting in the super long line in the center of like near the fountain, so it's like no no just direct heat, and it was probably 90 minutes to two hours. I was like, I want this for myself and for my niece more. And I met this these two ladies, one of them was a nurse, and I was telling her I was getting uh stuff for my niece when I make it, and I mentioned uh Olivia had Turner syndrome, and you said it's like not like a not super known, but you we didn't know about it. Um the lady was so familiar from about it, so that was crazy.
SPEAKER_01Which is I love it is exciting when you hear somebody who does does know about it because it just there's like a level of validation that comes with like talking to somebody and understanding like the complexities of it, and I it I don't know, it just feels nice. It's kind of like what it's kind of like when I'm here and I meet somebody from Illinois, like it just like there's this thing to like another person understands these like you know, different variables.
SPEAKER_02There is um if I can ever get him on or the Tampa Bay guy, if he's still in baseball, we have to go to see Pete Fairbanks. He plays for Tampa, right? Well, he was on Tampa. I'm just not sure if he's still with Tampa, uh, but we gotta get connected with him some way, somehow.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I think they they lost their daughter.
SPEAKER_02It could be something to learn more about that and uh have that as a mission.
SPEAKER_01Uh they really quick, they he has raised a ton, a ton of money for um, I think he works specifically with the Turner's Found like Turner Syndrome Foundation, and he's raised a lot of money.
SPEAKER_02During the process, you know, uh so many people take care are taking care of you, the kids, you're taking care of your kids, you're all this help, but you were fascinated and motivated to become a nurse. I think uh to change course is takes a lot of energy just to like go back to school. And now you're you have this job, a house, two kids, and that's not easy. What uh oh what was that moment that you're like I think this is what I have to do?
SPEAKER_01Um so 4th of July. So Olivia is born June 11th, 4th of July. I had been so they wrote me a uh my doctor wrote me a note to go back to work, like I think it was like eight days after I had Olivia. I was able to write it, they were able to write me a note to go back to work early so that when Olivia left the hospital, they knew she was gonna be on this medication that would make her immunocompromised, and I wouldn't be able to work. So I had been going to work in the day and then like immediately going to the hospital and spending nights with her. And I remember 4th of July being in the hospital and there was this nurse named Mary, and I can't talk about her without getting emotional about it because she was there the night Olivia was born and she would she was on the um she was in like the nursery area, but she would she would sneak into my in my room and write on the whiteboard like what Olivia's platelet counts were at the time because they were watching them so closely, and she would like just keep me updated and she was there the night that she was there the night that she was born and then she was there on the fourth of July and she was like, What are you doing? Like, because I kind of was like I wasn't sure what to do at that point. Like I had these kids, I was working, I mean, I had a I had I had a job, but I wasn't that I wasn't really passionate about. Um, I mean, I I I worked at a daycare and I and I loved it because I allowed me to be with Miles like as a baby and still continue to work, but it was like I I couldn't afford to do that long term. And she's like, why don't you go back to school for nursing? And I there was something about her. Also, she was like the one nurse that would start IVs on Olivia and actually get them because Olivia was getting blood transfusions at the time. And then she was the nurse that was our discharging nurse for Olivia, and I don't know, like I think I'm always looking for signs kind of. And her name was Mary, and she felt very like maternal, and our mom's name is Mary, and she just like she kind of it felt like it felt like a verbal slap in the face, like a wake-up slap. Like, well, what are you doing? Like, you can do this thing and like provide for yourself and your kids, and just get to a place where you can have this freedom and like this safety net. And I don't know, just that that night I was just like, you know what? I'm gonna figure it out. And I mean, I'm I'm very lucky. Like, I I have an incredible safety net between our parents and all of our aunts and uncles, obviously, all my brothers, and then Joel, like not a lot of people, not a lot of people have a partner that like does you know, like I used, you know, you you hear people talk about like 90-10 and like things aren't 50-50, things are 90-10 when they need to be. And Joel really does like I think we do a good job, good job, like when one of us needs more help, we're there, and vice versa.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's been uh one comment on that, like things aren't always easy, and to see where you start and where you where you're at's very, very important. Like everyone's, you know, they say everyone, this everyone's going through this for the first time. So it's yeah, you're upset that something's not happening how you want it, but you gotta think that they're experienced something this for the first time, and they might not realize in that moment, they might look back and be like, okay, this is how I need to make sure I do this the next time so we can figure this out.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And especially, oh sorry.
SPEAKER_02No, you're good.
SPEAKER_01I was just gonna say with you and exit and Gabriel being almost like a decade younger, like it's so because you have to, I guess, go like through a certain age to understand. But like, I remember being your age and feeling like I'm so far behind, I'm so far behind. And then like you get a little further out and you're like, there's not really a timeline for people. Like, I mean, if you're looking, like, you know, it's like people in their 30s, in their early 30s, are like, oh, I haven't been, you know, I don't have a spouse or something, and then like you get five years down the line because you're like, oh, I don't have a spouse in my early 30s, and all my friends are married, and like you don't wish misfortune on other people, but then you get to 35 and like maybe you're in a serious relationship, and all those people that you were going to weddings for in your 30s, now they're divorced. It's like there's not there's not one timeline, and it's like you're not you're not behind or ahead of anybody else or even yourself, like you just gotta keep, I think just keeping momentum either way, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Just keeping keeping busy, not busy to or bored up to not be bored, just to show you're interested in whatever you're doing.
SPEAKER_01That's why, like, with you, like I want so much for you. Like, I want you you know, this I I would love for this podcast to take off, and if this is a boring podcast today, just don't even air it. Um, but we can send it to Caleb Heron so he knows that I was finally on it and I'll stop harassing him. Um, but I um what day has come the day finally. Um, but I I think one thing like you you have this, you have a way of like wanting something like I I think you're you're capable of doing something that like other people aren't, and it's like like the perfect severance you have, and like you've gotten it's so fun. Like Gabe and I have talked about like seeing you at like the wish fest and stuff and seeing you talking to all these people in different industries, and it's just like that's so crazy that he seems like maybe shy and timid, but he looks so in his element, like talking about sports and music and like Chicago and all these things that you have interested in, and just like the community that you've been able to build because you're just like, Yeah, I'm not gonna give up. Like, I want this, I want these things.
SPEAKER_02That's what I was talking to my photographer friend who works at Oklahoma High School, and he he has a job that I feel like they just made they're like, Oh, this is what we have an idea for, we're gonna give it to you. Waiting for someone to do that for myself, but much like I share his stuff, he always shares mine. And I was sending this clip because I don't the search engines and the stuff doesn't work the same as they once did. So I send stuff that isn't getting picked up to show some people that would be interested. Well I was telling him uh he was saying how um he wanted more people to see the work, and I said much of the same to you. And then I said, uh, I believe so much in my work and those from others that I share. I want to see us succeed, so dedicated and believe so much in it all. Just gonna keep working for something towards the goal because well, maybe one day it'll figure itself out. But now this is this is fun to do.
SPEAKER_01Well, and I think, you know, like I listen to a lot of podcasts of different, like different types of podcasts, and I do think obviously I'm your number one fan, but I think aside from you being my sibling, like some of the questions you asked and like some of the knowledge you have about like the research that goes into the interviews that you've done. Like I thought I I thought it was so cool in your interview with um the guy that played one of the players that played basketball internationally, and you were like talking to him, and you know, you had talked about like how you had read that he keeps this journal, and then you're and then you're like talking to him about it in the in the podcast, and he literally had the journal. Like it is like these little tidbits that you have, and like these mindful questions that you ask, like not just about like I think you really real like you really recognize that one like no person is just these one things, like these athletes aren't just a sport, there's so much more that goes into it, or like these musicians, or just all these things, like, and I think that just goes is also because you have so many interests that you really are knowledgeable about and you care passionately about.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and I and I think that's like helped by trying different things and being a part of different groups, and that's what I tell people um uh like get get get get involved in different things, have those conversations with other people, don't like corner yourself into one thing, like it's good to have uh like singular interests, but uh to grow and to find comfort in things that aren't gonna be always easy as by having knowledge of those other people. Yeah, but uh so you said obviously you're still scared, but do you ever feel um relief like that? Oh, this this is awesome. You got these two little ones that are yourselves and you're having all you get to do all these things with them because I know I I have a lot of fun being around you guys.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you're watching you and like yes. Uh so to answer your question, like yes, I do feel relief. Like I think there's always new challenges that come with parenthood, but then there are things that we have like navigated that and I I'm like I I want like I feel like I'm a fairly modest person, but there's one thing like and there's so many things that I screw up in parenting in life and stuff, but like seeing my kids makes me really proud, and not only of them, but I like I do feel a lot of pride in like what Joel and I have accomplished and like um like I look back and I'm like you know, even just with different things that Miles has gone through, and I have a lot of pride in how much he worked in it, but I also like I I'm not a person that likes to argue, and I'm not a person that likes to question, but like being a parent has pushed my my boundaries too, like it's pushed my insecurities kind of out of the way, where it's like, if I feel like if this is the one biggest thing I guess I would say for any parent is like if you feel if you feel like you need something, or the worst thing that can ever happen with any situation, whether it's your parent or not, you know, in your case, like asking for interviews with people or stuff, the worst possible situation is somebody to say no. So, like with my kids and like with situations with Miles, if I need a resource or like with Olivia, if I need a resource, I'm gonna look for it and ask for it and advocate for it. And before, like, if somebody was like, Yeah, I don't think, you know, I don't think so, like I would have been like, okay, like, okay, it's like sorry for asking, but now I'm like, no, like I I want to talk to somebody about this, and if this isn't an option, like what can we do? And that that's made me like really proud as like because I thought I was gonna lose myself in motherhood, like I thought I would like lose my identity, but really like I've strengthened a lot of things, I think.
SPEAKER_02The uh that's that that's gonna be one of the questions about you know, they always talk about um like parents giving other people advice and how there's like we don't need to hear the only like you do a mother knows best, and you don't have to be getting all this unwanted uh opinions from other people, but sometimes you gotta those are necessary and key moments, and it doesn't always have to be from another parent, another resource. Right now, we are in a time where people are doubting doctors and other like strong, like knowledgeable people, and there's a reason certain things don't exist because of the knowledge that we already found and we utilize. So in in your in a different setting, you're you're seeking out one of those people that might know something to better uh smooth out a situation or to not not uh less it but level up as well to overcome and be uh in a situation, the best that's someone like uh so like to think bigger than what that people expect. So like you know, people that are autistic, they already put them in like a box and say, This is what's only possible. But no, this is what's possible. So maybe yourself or your kids, they're like, Well, this is this is who they are, who they who they're kind of been working towards. I don't see much out of that, but no, this is what they this is still the possibility, and similar to like the conversation about um ages and different milestones, different things happen to different people at different times, and uh you know anything can happen anytime, negatively, but also big things. Someone said like start thinking about like uh like what the what ifs and like when it kind of the conversation of when it does happen, like think about that moment instead of like something not happening, think about it actually happening.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think that there's value in like just even how you talk to yourself and like even those little words, like if turning if into when, like you're saying, I think that there's a lot of value in that. And with the thing about the advice from different people, I like I I try to move through through the world, like when I'm having interactions with people, and sometimes like you feel I think when people like you know, tell you, I think people more often than not are acting in from a place of kindness, like you know, when you hear parenting advice from other people, like sometimes I think your instinct as the person receiving it is to be defensive or like why are they telling me this? But I think one, I think people are just trying to create community. Number two, you don't have to take every bit of bit of advice that you get, but any information I think has the potential to be valuable. Like, even if it's not something like, and and just because somebody can't isn't in the same circumstance, like you know, Aunt Pat sometimes will will preface something by like, yeah, I know I don't have kids, but some of the best parenting advice I've gotten is from Aunt Pat, who doesn't who like didn't didn't birth children, but like she's been a teacher for decades, she's been a second mom to a lot of us.
SPEAKER_02You got 30 of those kids every every yeah, they're different every single time.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. So I think I do I do think like both to both points, like one, like the advice, you know, like the conversation around advice and and like adva advocating for your kids, and like again, like looking at the source of the information, like you know, like where you said, like we're getting a lot of our information on the internet, like look at the source of what you're getting information from. Like, I'm a big science based person, like I usually will defer to doctors, but also that being said, like we do have information at our our hands, ask questions, and then also as far as like wanting wanting things and attaining things like change.
SPEAKER_02your language that you tell yourself like you're saying yeah they um and then the yes trust the doctor but also when you look into these studies look at like uh like right now I think there's one about strawberries going on and while while things like are going on we don't know um we they they the study was actually of like two bins of those brown things that have maybe like six to nine they took two of those and did a study and the entirety of the study yes and it's hard to say like I'm sure with food there's there's a lot we don't know but at the same time to just say this this this small of a a research base yeah controls the whole thing. Uh it's like be skeptical but like there's certain things that have always remained the same that are working. So don't bear too much away from those.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And if you are doing research like you said like that's basically like if you it if you looked at the headline of whatever that study is it might tell you one thing but like do go go the steps further look at the authors of the the the research like look at their test subjects yeah um now um it's always cool to see where people started and where they've come from where they're at but a little bit of fun um it's summertime lots to do already done quite a bit what are some summer musts before that first crisp cold fall air comes rolling it and falls great but there's something lax and feels good about the summertime.
SPEAKER_01Well we just tried out we have two we had a pool open last year we had another pool open in town we did that yesterday um today's kind of a bad day to ask because it's supposed to be a rainy day here so we're doing um we're trying to get ahead of the game we're going through the kids' closets and then we're having a movie day and I'm it's gonna be like a like a throwback like I think we're gonna do the same lot now and then kind of situation. Miles wants to do a stargazing night so we're gonna drive out Rochester is like surrounded by country so we're gonna go out on one of the clear nights do that um we already hit up a twins game I would like to try to get to a socks game this year. Yeah but it was only boys only boys I know team couldn't I couldn't believe it that's okay it was it was cool to see you guys there it's it's fine I'm not I'm not in the whole video upset about it in the whole video of the nights on my TikTok you can see the full recap there of how much fun we had it was it was kind of cool I love to see my favorite guys all added up if only gave was there and it would have been the whole the whole crew I know we gotta get get get uh get all all of us together yeah I don't know we're having a really laid back summer like normally we go to Denver we're not gonna do that this year but um because Joel's sister lives there instead she's coming here next weekend for Jack Johnson so we're gonna go see and do some swimming um I'm doing a Ragnar run this summer so it's a uh relay from the Twin Cities to Duluth Minnesota are you gonna make banana pancakes for breakfast pancakes banana pancakes before the concert ooh I should and I actually think Juni my niece loves banana pancakes so that would be good when I was at Loris I did one of the retreats and we it was kind of far out so there was no light pollution it was probably the first time I saw that much uh stars and like quiet like no sounds so how'd you feel about it like uh it was it was I was in the moment but if I was more alone I'm sure that would have been kind of creepy like if oh yeah definitely a little bit younger I'm sure that would have been a little creepy now does all sound like a lot of fun I wish for the time to go slow and for all this to happen. Uh what's on your playlist uh right now ooh um I've been listening to a lot of a lot of edit james uh a lot of code of the friends um I have my running playlist so it's kind of I I made it I think in 2020 2019 maybe so lots of chance on there which I'm hoping we get to go see him in October perhaps yeah we got lots that concerts we should schedule yeah uh you know last night joel uh joel was listening to Bahamas which I haven't listened to him for a while and I was like man I love him um Alabama Shakespeare I don't know I'm like kind of all over the place obviously with Miles here tons of queen queen oh the summer 2019 the movie came out and I got really into queen so I had when I was cutting the grass at the schools I would listen to a bunch of different albums but I'll listen to all the songs from the Queen movie. I what I will say is I I think all this talk about parenting um I talk about this with Joel a lot and like two two signs that I'm gonna look for or that I always look for to see like how I've done as a parent either it it and it could go either way. It means I did really well or we really messed something up and they're like codependent is that the four kids are really close because I have two two older stepkids that I love and adore Tiana and Amir um and all four of them are really close. But then also their taste in music and I will say so I I came out and we have a neighbor kid that spends a lot of time at our house he is we joke that he's he's another yeah but he went to go see Earth, wind and fire with his parents and it was funny to hear these like middle school and high schoolers be like oh man like I can't believe I didn't get to go with you did they play September and I'm like we done I told Joel I was like we did something right here like that's so cool that they're jealous of and he told me that they got tickets for seven bucks and I was like I love Olivia Rodrigo but I was like it makes me a little sad that Olivia Rodrigo tickets are $400 and people will they're only charging seven dollars to see this legendary band.
SPEAKER_02I know that well one that's crazy two we're we're we're gonna be we're we're employing to work uh you're gonna see uh just earlier she talked about uh minimalism a little bit in some way and I I I think when my sister comes in she has a little shock and she feels like she needs to start cleaning and she's like oh my god look at all these things well I'm I'm selling these things off so we can see a live try to go see Olivia Roderine.
SPEAKER_01True yeah true I think my biggest thing is you have so much good stuff that I'm like please get insurance on these things because God forbid the house starts on fire I'm gonna be so devastated for you.
SPEAKER_02No one needs to know about my good stuff unless they're buying the good stuff.
SPEAKER_01It's true.
SPEAKER_02Which look no go finish oh no that's it oh add that playlist yeah I I created one on uh that says mile I just keep adding any favorite songs so it doesn't even have to be like four of my running 607 songs 38 hours seven minutes long but with some BS is I continue like if you put it on shuffle each day it's like it seems like it's always the same songs that come up it does it does seem like they defer to those what I like to do instead of making one like playlist so I do an annual playlist like I have my I think I started in 2017 and every year like if I'm watching a show and I Shazam it or if I'm in a restaurant like I just put them on to one playlist for that year.
SPEAKER_01And like the one year I think it was 2023 every day I would text message my niece Jelena a song and then that was how I did my 2023 playlist was like of hers. So then it almost is like there's like um it's like a sensory memory thing too like I'll play those I'll play that playlist for each year and like it has very distinct memories then attached to it.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Shazam man you are your brother's sister I know I know I have the I in another episode we'll have to talk about um like two and two and like what's it like where you were just two people and then more people uh growing up uh last one here I have for the day to end off what's wait before you do this can I ask you a three part question that's so many parts okay it'll it's just one answer for each okay so you're doing this podcast who athlete politician musician who are your dream dream guests you're trying to get the show canceled okay if you can't think of it off the cuff you can you can come back with it later athl you said athlete athlete politician musician because I feel like those are like kind of three pillars of like your interest musician wow sap i could I can list three and all of them would get me canceled Kanye Trump and uh it's hard to see about an athlete usually most of them are okay but the real bad ones I would never have because I don't like liars cheaters and abusers. Yeah that's fair so that narrows things down I suppose um which shows those guys also fit but um we'll see um for those you usually hear for when the athletes athletes um well music dual yes I was hoping this would come up her her you know you can say her looks are an obvious but she does this and she seems to be I haven't listened to the podcast clip but I have seen her in clips there's interest of what she's talking about.
SPEAKER_01I think you and I should I think you and I should start reading the books that she's reading.
SPEAKER_02And then I'll also take a look at what's out there um politician um dang well yeah you could say Donald Trump but you know George Bush is on people's people like George Bush these days but I probably would say uh I guess Barack Obama maybe maybe it would fit your Chicago native style he he likes basketball we do a lot of basketball maybe he'll let us do uh uh it in his library in one of the recording rooms or right center court of his basketball court there that would be cool that would be cool maybe he'll let me do it you know if I I said I I want to run into him so I can be like you know we met before I was gonna say you have talked to him actually played the play the clip you know here I was uh and then the clip's wrong they say my age wrong but still young enough for it's cool that that I know him uh and now I'm this however old yeah you gotta do a politic you gotta do a politics episode because I think you gotta bring up the Burning story at some point on your podcast. I'm trying to try to get uh a politician or two different ones that talk about different things or that they push for would be uh interesting like no politicians are perfect but there's some that are like talk focused on certain things that would be interesting.
SPEAKER_01I think to to advocate for like local because I think local voting is so important like get a when they do a local election get some local people on there.
SPEAKER_02And then uh athletes like you think of dead athletes Muhammad Ali would be cool.
SPEAKER_01I got really into boxing so that would have been fun um I get to like cross paths with a lot of athletes and I've had a lot of fun ones on um hmm I would I would like one of the pro league ones like in one of the men league but it would be kind of cool to get like everyone loves Caitlin Clark but it would be really sick to get like a unfiltered like a non-pr statement out of her like like this is this is gonna be post-career we're both old we're like let's let's look back at these these years and yes playing the long game I love it and you know I'm sure it's I'm maybe maybe she does actually she speaks on it a lot and gives some good answers and advocates for herself and like her teammates and her her opponents but I'm sure like she'd go a little bit harder maybe maybe it's just maybe it's not as mean towards her opponent but maybe it is like maybe she's secretly like I can't believe the stuff that these people put online I want to say it's from me or would be crazy if she actually does agree with a lot of I I can't see her um leaning that way especially uh she seems well liked by all her teammates that is the one thing that is especially with all the drama in the WNBA and I don't even think there's more or less drama in the WMBA over the NBA I think it's the way that it's the way that like it's televised and stuff like it's women people still have yeah I'm like are you kidding me have you never watched the NBA they play a certain way like they see them as like fragile um they this is how the people see what like you know that they project on like women they're they're fragile they're they emotional emotional they dramatic they can't be aggressive but it's a sport any every clip you see of them is what you see on an everyday of the men's sports so really it is wild to see so that's that would probably be one of them um an athlete right now Giannis Giannis especially I've have a couple blogs out there of Giannis when he first came to America or got really interested in America things so he he would uh he went to like the mall one time talked about his American adventures in the mall eating certain foods those are funny because he also has these clips where he's kind of over sexual with his wife in public where she like isn't like talks about it with him but like it's just wild to see LeBron would be kind of a cool like I'm sure he's like mean guy but it'd be cool to be like a friend and do the interview well I think you should talk to him about how um because I've always felt like honestly LeBron I know that people like he's always in the argument of greatest of all time but I think he might be a better actor than even he is a athlete he drags me up in films. Also cat was in um did you know that he has a cameo in cat in Deviler's Prada I did hear about that I haven't seen what but that was funny. Yeah no LeBron has some I forget where I just watched him but he was kind of oh not LeBron it it was Drake actually Drake was in a commercial for like Nike or something and he's like a cornball funny you're about to get me canceled I can't give any opinions on Drake on a uh thing that's gonna be put out to the world okay really quick and I know what's going long but um as a person living in Minnesota I have conflicted feelings but I do think watching clips of Anthony Edwards he's not a personality that I normally would vibe with but sometimes he makes me laugh a lot and I think it's so funny because you know your niece thinks that they're like besties because he she went to the Timberwolves game with like a DHH group and she was like Mom Anthony Edwards talked me and I was like no way like what did he say? And she's like yeah he walked past our group of students and was like hey y'all and that was it but she's like I'm locked in yeah we gotta get her to befriend the Olivia Miles and no well you'll have to if you see her at the WNBA event there you gotta yeah we gotta lock that in and the last one unless there's uh anything else okay what's what's the goal what would you like what's what's a goal of yours what would you like to see the future uh look like for yourself I don't care about the world I do care but sometimes sometimes it's okay to think about yourself thank you I was actually um that's funny that you asked that because I was thinking about I was so nervous about doing this podcast after begging for it for so long not their bucket list that was go back to the bucket list this is really for for people that don't know I was going through desperate I was good going the desperate route I was I was like DMing Caleb hair and his his team is probably like thank god she's probably I mean if they're even reading them but I've been like I was gonna I was trying so hard to message him to finally let me be on his podcast so I could be like Xaver Caleb Hare let me on his podcast before you let me on um so I guess I guess now that I've made my podcast debut I really want to run a marathon. Like that is and I'm pushing I'm pushing I'm like knocking on the door of my next decade of years. So I want to do it before that birthday and like seeing you put yourself out there because I think even like with your sports writing and stuff like I think writing and like printing it out to like and like putting it out and onto the internet you know so publicly I do think that there's like a level of bravery there and I'm just not that brave but like I always I always loved writing and like that is I would like to like even if nobody reads it like just get more routine in writing and maybe doing a blog so something along those lines.
SPEAKER_02Yeah my siblings are actually the better writers they they know more words.
SPEAKER_01Oh no not not me okay I was also thinking about how we're having this podcast where we're chatting and I think I feel like we've always been the two of the like I don't believe this but I think people have grouped us as the two less intelligent siblings which it's fine. But I'm I'm the funniest that's all I you're gonna get me canceled in the family.
SPEAKER_02Uh yeah no I like that I do like uh when I was working in Hickory and the newspaper would get dropped off there I would always tell everybody I'm like guys the the newspapers here today make sure you go pick up a copy or to my regulars unfortunately the this store I'm at we cover the neighborhood but the paper doesn't get sold at this store. So I'm a little bummed. So I tell well go go look up my name online you'll find more of what I do.
SPEAKER_01Yeah I I never get less excited when I see your your articles like it always seeing your name in print is so cool. Something that I have not heard mentioned on the podcast was the fact that our middle school has like put you on the board like on the board for um notable graduates I when I saw that I was like in tears I was like yes he deserves this recognition they're lying I'm just an average Joe.
SPEAKER_02Nope well thank you so much for joining this was this this this this uh podcast is a better one to have you on this is uh more personable I like to talk more about everything it's not well people think it we're talking about you know grouping and what we project on the people it's an everything show we're talking to people in cool places and what things I love. So thank you so much to my lovely sister Bertha for coming on I I love her. I love my niece and nephew. I can't wait to see them again thank you so much.
SPEAKER_01Thank you also I hope that you got other listeners on like those ones from out of state that'd be cool.
SPEAKER_02Yes that would be awesome so thanks everyone for listening. I love you thank you to my sister Berta for coming on the show I had a lot of fun learning more about her life and experiences family is so important to me and I find it so important to have someone like my sister to learn from and discuss stuff together with thank you to her I can't wait for another and to see her again soon. That's it for this week follow extra time pod on socials to stay up to date as we have much more to come. Once again I'm Xavier Sanchez and thank you for listening to the Extra Time Podcast.